


your body's poetry

by SwabbieJilly



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-23
Updated: 2017-04-23
Packaged: 2018-10-22 22:01:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10706010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SwabbieJilly/pseuds/SwabbieJilly
Summary: After the fourth Tuesday in a row, Holtz couldn’t take it anymore. She was a scientist after all; it was in her nature to be curious. It was unhealthy to repress an inquiring mind.





	your body's poetry

**Author's Note:**

> so you know how [kristen wiig danced to chandelier that one time](https://vimeo.com/119336957) and it was really beautiful and amazing? well, i've been listening to a lot of sia lately, and i can't do that without thinking of kristen's performance. then i think about erin dancing like that, then i think erin and holtz and yep. i had to get this out of my head.
> 
> when i wrote that particular scene, i had ['move your body'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vxrSAwtdtuQ) in mind so feel free to give that a listen.
> 
> thank you so much to the wonderful and darling [madeleine](http://jillbert.tumblr.com) for being my beta (like always). you make me better everyday.

After the fourth Tuesday in a row, Holtz couldn’t take it anymore. She was a scientist after all; it was in her nature to be curious. It was unhealthy to repress an inquiring mind.

 

The very first time it happened, Holtz noticed right away. Every day, without fail, Erin stayed at work until 5:00 PM to the minute. Monday to Friday. Always. Erin liked routines. She relied on them, even. So when Erin Gilbert ducked out at 4:30 that first Tuesday, just after Abby and Patty left, Holtz couldn’t help _but_ notice. It was an anomaly.

 

She reasoned it away, inferring that maybe Erin had an appointment, or she wasn’t feeling well. It was nothing really the first time. Holtz put it in the back of her mind, and worked until she passed out on her workbench at 10:37 PM like she often did.

 

Erin returned to work the next day like normal. 9:00 AM sharp. With a double espresso with Holtz’ name on it (literally). Everything was just as it should be. Holtz even wondered if maybe she imagined it.

 

The Tuesday after that, Patty noticed too. She had come back two or three minutes after clocking out for the day to grab a coat she forgot, nearly knocking Erin flat in the doorway as she tried to sneak out.

 

Not one to beat around the bush, Patty asked Erin about it right away.

 

“Hey Erin! You callin’ it quits? I thought you always left at five!”

 

It was clear that Erin was flustered, she was all rosy-cheeked and awkward as she shrunk away from Patty.

 

“Oh yeah. Something came up. Totally random, out of the blue. I was like ‘ah oh my god, today? Really that…. We.. today? I can’t believe I have to leave work early for the first time in a whi- uh, ever.’ And yup, I should.... I have to. Bye!” Erin rambled, skittering out the door like startled bird.

 

Holtz couldn’t stop a chuckle from escaping. She wondered what could’ve possibly happened in Erin’s life that made her think she could sell even the simplest lie.

 

“Okay, whatever girl,” Patty called over her shoulder, more for Holtz’ benefit than Erin’s, who was long gone. “I don’t think I even want to know what you do after dark!”

 

Patty and Holtz shared a laugh and a knowing glance before Patty turned to exit.

 

“Night, baby!” she called to Holtz on her way out.

 

“Night Patrillionare!”

 

By then, Holtz was sure Erin was hiding something.

 

She was also sure it was none of her business.

 

“Hey Abby,” Holtz started a week later. Wednesday morning, after Erin ducked out for the third Tuesday in a row. “Does Erin have any hobbies?”

 

It was early, around 8:00 AM. Long before they expected Erin or Patty to come in. Holtz and Abby were always early risers.

 

Abby just sort of laughed in reply. “Oh sure. Knitting. Embroidery. Shuffleboard. 45’s.”

 

“Okay Abby…”

 

“Bingo with the girls…”

 

Holtz just laughed and shook her head.

 

“I don’t know, Holtz,” Abby finally answered after her chuckles tapered off. “Erin doesn’t get out much. I know she did a few extra curriculars in high school and college, but that was mostly for the extra credit. I don’t think she was really interested in any of it.”

 

Holtz considered that. “What kind of clubs was she in?”

 

“Uh, band for starters,” Abby supplied after a moment.

 

“Naturally.”

 

“Mathletes.”

 

“Of course.”

 

“Social committee, but I think she dropped that.”

 

“I can’t imagine why.”

 

“Oh yeah, and Rainbow Allies!”

 

“Reeeeaaallllllllly??” Holtz sat up a little straighter (gayer?) at that.

 

“Oh yeah,” Abby said simply. “We both were.”

 

“Fascinating…”

 

“Yeah,” Abby laughed. “Best to ask her about that one yourself. You’ll get nothing from me.”

 

Holtz relaxed a little, and picked up the socket wrench she had placed down at the start of the conversation. “Ah, I’m in no hurry.” She paused, wondering if it was fair of her to continue her inquiries. “You don’t know what might be tearing Erin away from the office early on Tuesday evenings, would you?”

 

Abby scoffed. “No clue. Why don’t you just ask?”

 

Holtz tugged on her ear a little. “I don’t think she wants anyone to know.”

 

“There ya go then, Holtzy. Mind your business. She’ll tell us if she wants. Until then, just let it go.”

 

“It’s weird though, right?”

 

“Hi kettle, this is black.”

 

“Abigail. Abbsters. Fabulous Abulous. I can’t just _let it go..._ I’m a scientist. I always need to know _why_.”

 

“Okay let me just grab my phone and give Dr. Gilbert a ring here.”

 

“Abby—”

 

“Hi Erin, Holtz wants to know why you’re—”

 

“Abby, I know you didn’t dial anything. Your phone is still locked.”

 

Abby ignored her and continued. “Oh, a secret mission from the CIA?”

 

“ _Abbbbyy_ — _”_

 

“Oh, and now that you’ve told me, you have to kill me? Oh darn, and today was my day to buy lunch for the team.”

 

“Okay—”

 

“Toxic gas through the phone? It doesn’t seem possible and yet…”

 

Holtz rolled her eyes, trying to mask her smirk. Abby carried on, making a big show of fake gagging and choking followed by a melodramatic fall to the floor and a full thirty seconds of thrashing and gurgling. Holtz ignored her and continued her work while she waited for Abby to wrap up the scene.

 

Eventually Abby got up, wheezing with laughter.

 

“You done?” Holtz asked flatly.

 

Abby nodded while laughing.

 

“You made your point. Great performance, too. Haven’t seen one like that since Dean Shanks tried to take away the Keurig machine in the staff room at the Institute. ”

 

“Ah. That _was_ a great one. Thank you so much. Now stay out of it.”

 

Shortly thereafter, Abby retreated to the library and Patty and Erin turned up for the day around the same time, chatting about their latest bust.

 

If Erin knew that Holtz was beginning to suspect something, she did well to hide it. Holtz’ coffee appeared on her workbench as it always did, and Erin was at the whiteboard for most of the morning, as she always was.

 

And Holtz was more curious than ever.

 

So it was obvious by the fourth Tuesday that Erin left early Holtz _had_ to follow her. She had no other option.

 

Initially it wasn’t clear where the destination was. Erin’s path led Holtz to a quiet corner of New York City which was mostly comprised of artisan shops, hole-in-the-wall restaurants, and quaint little bakeries with hand-painted signs.

 

Needless to say, the block smelled amazing. Holtz watched around a corner as Erin hustled toward the side entrance of one of the bigger buildings. It seemed like it led her up to the second floor. A few others filed in after, and Holtz resolved to camp out across the street at a coffee shop.

 

She waited for a while; doodled blue-prints and equations on a napkin, played on her phone, annoyed the patrons. A little over an hour passed when Holtz watched most of the people who followed Erin exit from the mystery establishment. Based on the mass exodus, Holtz assumed it was some sort of class. She also noted that Erin was not among the lot that left.

 

She wasn’t sure what her plan was, or even if she had one at all. Holtz had already come this far, so she figured she may as well see it through.

 

Holtz paid the barista at the coffee shop and sprinted across the street to where Erin was. She was halfway up the stairs when she heard the unmistakeable tumbling of a pop-song’s baseline muffled through a door. She peered through it— a swinging glass thing a little fogged from humidity— and finally discovered what had been keeping Erin so busy.

 

At the top of the stairs was a modest sized dance studio. The walls were all mirrors, some of which were probably two-way, evidenced by the door built in. A railing ran along the perimeter finishing the room with a classic look and style, offset only by the dim light. Holtz guessed that the studio would be closing soon.

 

Erin was in the dead centre. Her outfit was simple; allowing for easy movement, Erin wore plain black leggings and a loose-fitting tank top. Holtz noted affectionately that Erin was not wearing any shoes. As Erin moved, Holtz could see flashes of a bright pink sports bra though the wide sleeves, the only touch of colour in the whole ensemble.  

 

The song was familiar, something Holtz heard on the radio a thousand times but never particularly cared for. As she watched Erin move though, the song was quickly becoming a favourite. It was as if the lyrics had a new meaning. She saw the way the beat varied in Erin’s steps. She saw the emotions of the song on Erin’s face. It was amazing to watch, and even though Holtz knew she shouldn’t, she couldn’t bring herself to turn away.

 

The song ended, and Holtz swallowed hard around a lump in her throat. She was just about to leave when Erin must’ve caught a glimpse of Holtz in the mirror. She turned to meet Holtz’ eyes.

 

Holtz froze, feeling a sheepish blush pinch at her cheeks. She swallowed once more and waved stiffly to Erin. There was no point in denying what brought her there, so she decided she’d just roll with it. Erin’s face was unreadable as Holtz entered.

 

“So this is where you’ve been sneaking off to every week?”

 

“Um.” Erin was still as a statue. “Did you follow me all the way here?”

 

“Yeah.” Holtz was a little humbled. She didn’t necessarily regret her choices, but she was beginning to feel the weight of the consequences. “I’m sorry. I should’ve just asked.”

 

“Yeah, probably.” Erin face and tone were both neutral. Erin let that hang in the air for a moment. Then, to Holtz’ astonishment, Erin relaxed and shifted her weight to a more natural position.

 

“It’s okay though,” Erin murmured with a slight smile. “Someone was bound to find out eventually. I’m a terrible liar.”

 

Holtz couldn’t help but laugh. “No kidding.” Pause. “Erin, that was amazing. Why didn’t you just tell us from the get-go?”

 

For the first time that night, Erin looked a little embarrassed. “You guys are all such good dancers! I didn’t want you to think I was trying to compete or anything.”

 

“Erin, no one would’ve thought that.”

 

“Yeah maybe.” Erin paused again. “Do you really think I was good?”

 

“Are you kidding me? You were amazing!” Holtz meant it, too. She had no idea Erin could move like that. She was usually so stiff and awkward. She felt honoured to see a more relaxed and fluid version of her friend. Holtz continued, “Is this your first time doing something like this? I am not exaggerating when I say you looked like a total pro out here. I’ll even admit I got a little choked up, even.”

 

“Really?” Erin was almost fully smiling now.

 

“Yes! I had no idea that song was so… emotional. It was beautiful.”

 

The red on Erin’s cheeks grew a little richer. “Thanks Holtzmann. That means a lot coming from you.”

 

“Yeah, my moves are pretty lit. But _you-”_

 

“Okay Holtz, that’s enough. You’re starting to embarrass me,” Erin said with an uncomfortable laugh.

 

“Oh, sorry. I’ll lay off.” As she shuffled her feet, Holtz noticed how their voices rang off the walls. Suddenly the room felt very small. “I really am sorry.”

 

“It’s okay, really. I’m uh... I’m glad I have someone to talk to about this now.”

 

“So you’re liking it?”

 

Erin’s face was positively radiant. “I _love_ it!”

 

“Wonderful,” Holtz said honestly. “So, why dancing?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“I mean, you could’ve done kickboxing, or yoga, or spin classes. But modern dance?”

 

Erin shrugged. “I don’t know really.” She plopped down in the middle of the floor and sat crossed-legged. She patted the spot next to her invitingly, and Holtz was quick to oblige. The two sat in the silent studio accompanied only by the small stereo next to them.

 

Erin sighed thoughtfully, and explained further. “I guess I just got tired of sitting in my apartment by myself all the time. I don’t live too far from here, so when I saw the poster hanging in the coffee shop across the street—”

 

“Yes, I am familiar with that particular establishment.”

 

“—it just sort of seemed like a sign. So I did it. And I love it.”

 

Holtz had never seen Erin smile like that. “Yeah, I can tell.” Holtz thought about what she’d say next for a moment or two. “So, can you teach me some of the moves?”

 

“Really?” Erin asked through a smile.

 

“Yes! If you show me yours, I’ll show you mine,” Holtz offered, raising her eyebrows at Erin suggestively.

 

“Oh my god, Holtz give it rest.” Erin turned her head away, but Holtz could tell she was hiding a smile. Then Erin pressed play on the stereo.

 

She hopped to her feet, holding her hand out for Holtz to follow. She did, and Erin was standing in front of her, nodding her head along to the beat. Holtz did the same and then they were tapping their feet. Erin moved her arms in some sort of slow-motion wave and Holtz did her best to follow along. The moves got a little more complicated during the bridge and soon Holtz could no longer follow Erin’s lead. That didn’t stop her from moving though; she stayed in motion watching Erin as closely as she could.

 

When the chorus rolled around, things got wild. Holtz let the beat guide her and went into full freestyle. Erin didn’t seem to notice at all, and Holtz saw that Erin fell into some sort of trance.

 

Holtz learned something new about Erin that day; she dances like she solves equations. Every step was measured and counted carefully. Every shift was precise and methodical. She didn’t seem to miss a beat, her focus intense. Holtz saw it as a unique form of beauty. She was enthralled. Beguiled. Inspired. Intrigued.

 

Their movements would sync every once and a while, and each time they did Holtz felt some strange energy surge through her. She wanted to dance with Erin all the time. She never wanted the song to end.

 

When it did, Holtz stood panting in front of Erin. As the adrenaline faded and Holtz became aware of herself again, she realized the combat boots were a bad decision that morning. Her feet were quietly throbbing and slick with sweat, but she couldn’t have been happier.

 

“That was amazing ladies!” an unfamiliar voice declared. Erin and Holtz were jolted back to reality to find a rather large man beaming at them from a previously concealed door across the room.

 

Holtz unconsciously took a step away from Erin and looked between her companion and the man before them.

 

“Erin I can honestly say that was one of your best performances yet!”

 

“Really?” Erin gasped, still a little short of breath from the routine.

 

“Absolutely! You were much more relaxed than you usually are in class.”

 

“Wow, I didn’t realize.” Erin glanced at Holtz. “I guess I just needed the right partner.”

 

It was Holtz’ turn to beam.

 

“You must introduce me to your friend,” he inquired, raising a suspecting eyebrow.

 

“This is 2017, I can introduce myself.” Holtz closed the distance in a few strides and stuck her hand out. “Holtzmann.”

 

“My pleasure!” the man replied, accepting her hand with a theatrical flourish. “I’m Jeremiah, Erin’s instructor.”

 

“Pleasure’s all mine.” Holtz released his hand and noticed Erin had stepped forward to join them.

 

“I’m sorry I kept you though, coach. I sort of forgot you had to wait for me before you could leave.”

 

“Oh don’t worry about it, honey. Nate’s cooking tonight, and he’s always late anyway.” He turned his attention back on Holtz. “You know Holtzmann, there are still a few spots left in my class, and six weeks left to go. Based on what I saw tonight, you’d be fine coming in at an intermediate level, if you’re interested. I can even give you a discount since you missed the first few.” He winked.

 

“Thank you so much. Put my name down as a solid maybe.”

 

Erin cut in. Holtz guessed she felt bad enough about keeping her instructor already.

 

“Thank you again, Jeremiah. I’ll see you next week!”

 

“You sure will. Have a good night ladies.”

 

Before Holtz knew it, Erin was practically dragging her away.

 

The evening air was so refreshing. Once the two reached the sidewalk their strides became a little bit more relaxed and lack-a-daisy.

 

“So are you going to do it?” Erin said after about half a block.

 

“Do what?”

 

“Come to dance class with me?”

 

Honestly, Holtz was a little thrown. She sputtered for moment or two, shocked by Erin’s directness. “Uh, well, that’s sort of up to you.”

 

“What? No it’s not.”

 

“Sure it is. I don’t want to jump in and take over the thing you do to keep you busy on weeknights.”

 

Erin blinked a few times. It seemed like she wasn’t sure what to say. “Well, I don’t know, it might be nice to have someone I know come to class with me...maybe we can help each other practice?”

 

A jolt ran through her, low and sudden. Holtz found herself needing to swallow before responding. “I don’t know if Jeremiah could handle me.”

 

Erin laughed. “Holtz, if I can handle you anyone can.”

 

“Oh yeah. I bet you could handle me really good.”

 

“Oh my god. I can’t walk with you anymore.” Erin jogged a few paces ahead, laughing all the while. Holtz skipped ahead a little to say in step.

 

“Alright, alright,” Holtz conceded, holding her hands up in surrender. “Are you sure you wouldn’t mind a tag-a-long to your classes?”

 

Erin’s face lit up for the second time that night. “No way! I think it’s a great idea.”

 

Holtz shoved her hands into her pockets sheepishly. “Okay, I guess I’ll give it a go. What have I got to lose?”

 

“Great! Next time when you follow me, how about we just split a cab from work. I don’t want you stalking me through the shadows again, okay?”

 

Holtz chuckled a little. “Right.”

 

They took a few more strides before Erin spoke up again. “Who knows Holtz, maybe you can meet some hot chick in the class who will be crazy enough to dance with you.”

 

Holtz looked up at Erin. She was staring straight ahead, oblivious to it all. Oblivious to the fact that Holtz’ heart skipped a beat as Erin smiled. Oblivious to the fact that most of her hair had fallen loose from her ponytail. Oblivious to the fact that the only woman Holtz ever wanted to dance with was Erin.

 

“Pssh, no one is that crazy.” Holtz ran her hand through her coif.

 

Erin considered that for a moment. “You know, maybe crazy was the wrong word. You need someone _courageous_.” She stopped abruptly, and turned on her heel to face Holtz. She didn’t realize right away, so Holtz almost walked right into her. They were inches away, but Erin didn’t move. She didn’t back down.

 

Erin licked her lips before continuing. “And I um…I’m trying to be braver everyday.”

**Author's Note:**

> hope you liked it! maybe someday i'll post a fic at not 2:30 AM....


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